Excerpt from this article:
Here are a few common examples of Yelp review comments and their actual meanings:
“The staff was snooty” I felt intimidated by how fancy this place was and/or arrived underdressed.
“The actor/waiter was…” My waiter was extremely good-looking and I resent that.
“Not authentic” I’d like to take this opportunity to brag about my world travels to a bunch of strangers online.
“Hipster” There was kale on the menu and nobody else was wearing UGG boots.
“We didn’t get a free ____” I am a terrible human being who doesn’t comprehend how the economy works.
“The portions were too small” I’m probably from the Midwest and/or typically dine at large chains where I’m accustomed to being served a giant trough of food.
“Too scene-y” Nobody hit on me.
“Not enough vegetarian options” I use my dietary restrictions as a means to get attention and can’t accomplish that at an actual vegetarian restaurant, which is where I should have gone in the first place.
“The ______ was terrible” I lack a basic understanding of the concept of personal preference.