Mom Was Shamed For Staring at Her Phone in Post-Birth Photo – Her Snapback Is SO Good

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Unfortunately, though, mommy shamers were quick to pounce on the new mom of five.

Many judged her drink of choice, but most called her out for not being more present with her just-born baby. One commented sarcastically, “it’s important to check your phone right now.” Another wrote, “she’s obviously googling parental advice.”

Although most of the negative comments were deleted, her legion of fans stepped in, sharing not only that she earned that hard-fought soda but that there was likely a very good reason she was on her phone.

Rude Daycare Shames Moms for Using Phones During Pick-Up

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According to Mom.me’s Jeanne Sager, the sign was posted at a Texas daycare, where mother Juliana Farris Mazurkewicz spotted it and posted a photo of it to Facebook. Of course, the combination of daycare and phones is like blood in the water for the sanctimony sharks, and the picture is blowing up with more than 380,000 shares so far. A lot of them are cheering on the daycare, because you just know they’ve been waiting their whole lives to talk about this kind of “neglect,” preferably with a lot of exclamation points and pointed comments about how they “never” do that.

Still, many of the comments are defending the hypothetical phone-moms, pointing out that there are a lot of things these people could be forced to take care of at right that moment. (Are you a doctor? A lawyer? Waiting for important medical test results? Maybe you’d better pick up your phone when it rings.)

 

Is it right to ‘Facebook shame’ alleged harassers?

A partial screenshot of Jasleen Kaur's Facebook post about an alleged harassment incident.

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The Facebook post has sparked a heated debate in India about the “shaming” of alleged harassers on the internet. In her post earlier this week, Kaur said a man on a motorbike made obscene remarks to her at a traffic light in Delhi. She reported the incident to the police but also uploaded a picture of the man, which has since been shared more than 130,000 times.

Unusually, the police acted on her post: they arrested a man, Sarvjeet Singh, and charged him with sexual harassment, criminal intimidation, and insulting the modesty of a woman, according to local reports.

The public mood initially seemed to be supportive of Kaur… Then came a twist in the story. The alleged harasser, Singh, who has been released on bail, denies the allegations and went public too, to accuse Kaur of courting publicity and using the incident to further her own political causes.

Dove and Twitter Will Analyze Your Tweets To Gauge ‘Body Positivity’

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Are you indulging in body shaming via Twitter — perhaps without even being aware? Dove and Twitter will be happy to analyze your tweets and let you know.

In a partnership announced Saturday at SXSW, the two are unveiling the #SpeakBeautiful Effect tool, which allows users to retweet an invitation from the @Dove handle via accounts they want analyzed. Dove will tweet the user back a link with a personalized analysis of their tweeting tendencies in minutes.

New Dove research shows 62% of girls wish social media would “teach and empower them about body positivity,” so this is an effort to that end. Working on the #SpeakBeautiful project are Edelman Razorfish, VaynerMedia and Mindshare.

 

Instagram Has Become a Body-Image Battleground

Vin

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[Vin] Diesel, the actor in the “Fast and Furious” series, posted a response to the accusation he had a “dad bod” on his [Instagram] feed over the weekend, writing, “Body-shaming is always wrong!” He then followed up with a shot flashing his (pretty pronounced) abs.

It suggests that the social media platform could become something of a soapbox for this particular issue. Perhaps even the most effective soapbox.

It makes sense, after all, since body image, while a psychological issue, begins with optics, and Instagram is first and foremost an optical platform. Mr. Diesel’s words convey his position, but his picture shuts the debate down.

In any case, I don’t think this was necessarily part of the Instagram remit from the start, but the folks who administer the platform might start paying attention. There’s a lot of focus at the moment on what the platform can do for fashion, and on its retail potential, but it seems to me it may have at least as much, if not more, potential as the fulcrum of the national conversation on size and health.

A Note on Call-Out Culture

Photo: The article’s writer, Asam Ahmad

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Call-out culture refers to the tendency among progressives, radicals, activists, and community organizers to publicly name instances or patterns of oppressive behaviour and language use by others. People can be called out for statements and actions that are sexist, racist, ableist, and the list goes on. Because call-outs tend to be public, they can enable a particularly armchair and academic brand of activism: one in which the act of calling out is seen as an end in itself.

What makes call-out culture so toxic is not necessarily its frequency so much as the nature and performance of the call-out itself. Especially in online venues like Twitter and Facebook, calling someone out isn’t just a private interaction between two individuals: it’s a public performance where people can demonstrate their wit or how pure their politics are. Indeed, sometimes it can feel like the performance itself is more significant than the content of the call-out. This is why “calling in” has been proposed as an alternative to calling out: calling in means speaking privately with an individual who has done some wrong, in order to address the behaviour without making a spectacle of the address itself.

The Public Humiliation Diet: A How-To

The Public Humiliation Diet: A How-To

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I’ve struggled with my weight for my entire life… So I needed to set some ground rules for myself to lose weight, ground rules that I felt were reasonable to follow for the rest of my adult life. Here’s what I did:

3. I posted that weight daily on Twitter. But it doesn’t matter where. It can be on Facebook or your blog or whatever. Shit, you can print it out and stick it on your office cube every day. What I found doing this is that it 1) gave me a public incentive to stick to a goal; 2) garnered support from people. Most Americans struggle with their weight, and most of them sympathize with someone else trying to get healthier. Support helps. Maybe some people will tease you, but that’s its own incentive anyway. Part of losing weight is acknowledging the fact that you have issues with food. And holy shit, do I have issues with food.

How One Stupid Tweet Blew Up Justine Sacco’s Life

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It was a profound reversal for Sacco. When I first met her, she was desperate to tell the tens of thousands of people who tore her apart how they had wronged her and to repair what remained of her public persona. But perhaps she had now come to understand that her shaming wasn’t really about her at all. Social media is so perfectly designed to manipulate our desire for approval, and that is what led to her undoing. Her tormentors were instantly congratulated as they took Sacco down, bit by bit, and so they continued to do so. Their motivation was much the same as Sacco’s own — a bid for the attention of strangers — as she milled about Heathrow, hoping to amuse people she couldn’t see.

Edited to add links to these other articles on Jon Ronson’s book:

So You’ve Been Publicly Shamed review – Jon Ronson on rants and tweets: “This terrifying study of social media fury is another superb product from brand Ronson, humorous journalist and moralist par excellence”

The Internet Shaming of Lindsey Stone: Article by Jon Ronson about how “When a friend posted a photograph of charity worker Lindsey Stone on Facebook, she never dreamed she would lose her job and her reputation. Two years on, could she get her life back?”

Passive, aggressive and pissed off: Our culture of perpetual outrage

Robert Nickelsberg/Getty Images

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What is more likely? That the sun will rise tomorrow or that someone, somewhere, will launch an online campaign decrying anything and everything? It may be an impossible question to answer, because ours is an age of unending offence.

…But you’ll never know unless you ask, and it’s the asking, in real time, in real life—not the posting or tweeting—that seems to be a problem for this increasingly offended, yet complacent world. Indeed, what’s unprecedented about the man-spreading uproar isn’t that there are people on this Earth who have the gall to take up more public space than they need, but that the parties inconvenienced by this behaviour would rather fume in silence and take discreet Instagram photos of the offending seat hoggers than ask the hoggers to move over. The so-called man-spreading epidemic is not a problem borne of male privilege. It’s one borne of timidity—and a passive-aggressive attitude aided and abetted by social media.

After all, why talk to a stranger—a potentially awkward affair—when you can yell into the digital ether at a million strangers, virtually risk-free? Why take a chance at eliciting stares and snickers from the corporeal beings in your midst, when you know that your grievance will be met with nothing but praise and support by your boosters on the Internet? Conservative pundits have labelled the man-spreading affair a case of politically correct feminism gone wild. But I think it’s more a case of stunted social graces. Despite social media’s reputation as the cyberbullying, revenge-porn hub of the universe, it is also, for many users, all gain and no pain. It is a narcissistic echo chamber, in which validation comes free of charge—or, almost free of charge; a seat on the subway is a small price to pay for the righteous indignation of hundreds of sympathetic strangers.

In light of this, it would be interesting to learn how often people take their Twitter and Facebook grievances not to their followers, but to their real-life foes. My guess is that the number is exceedingly low. Maybe we’re in need of a new word to complement “slacktivism,” the Internet-era portmanteau of “slacker” and “activism.” Call it “sloutrage,” a behaviour exhibited by people who are perfectly content to scream at the top of their lungs into a virtual room of millions, but cower at the mere thought of face-to-face confrontation with a single, splay-legged stranger.

Digital vigilantism: think before putting pictures of ‘wrongdoing’ online

messina thief

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There are thousands of Facebook pages and many standalone websites dedicated to accusing people of just about anything you care to think about. There’s the outing of ice cream cake thieves by gelato makers Messina on its Facebook page, clearly identified through a security camera photo and an arrow declaring “cake thief!”. There’s a “dob (inform) a bad driver” page, and the even more specific “Perth bad drivers” page. That’s not to mention the many “shame a homewrecker” websites, or the “dob in a horse rug terrorist” website, where you can dob on those who are cruel to their horses via over-rugging. The examples are endless. Most of the time, the “offenders” are clearly identified by face, number plate … or horse.