An Artist Is Putting Tinder and LinkedIn Profile Pics Side-By-Side

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If you would take your profile pics from your LinkedIn and Tinder accounts and put them next to each other, how would they differ? That is the central question of Belgian artist Dries Depoorter’s new project, Tinder In. Using his own Tinder profile, he collected pictures of random women within his radius, and used their names to subsequently look up their LinkedIn profile pictures. Depoorter is planning to exhibit the series in a gallery in Paris soon in the form of ten double portraits: the professional and somewhat stiff headshots of LinkedIn on the left, and the intimate, often scantily-clad Tinder shots on the right.

At first glance, the project seems a bit like public shaming: look at these women struggling with themselves, their images, their sexuality. There is a sense of discomfort to see these pictures side by side, firstly for the women in the photos (why is the project limited to just women?), but secondly, also for yourself. Everyone is ‘guilty’ of these split online personalities simply because every online platform demands something entirely different from yourself. A business network site and an online hookup app will understandably lead to the biggest contrast.

Has Tinder Really Sparked a Dating Apocalypse?

Woman text messaging on cell phone

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Tinder super-users are an important slice of the population to study, yes, but they can’t be used as a stand-in for “millennials” or “society” or any other such broad categories. Where are the 20-somethings in committed relationships in Sales’ [Tinder-related Vanity Fair] article? Where are the awkward, lonely young men who feel like they can’t find anyone to have sex with, let alone date them? Where are the women who stay off Tinder because they don’t like the meat-market feel of it? Where are the men and women who find lifetime partners from these apps? (Just off the top of my head, I can think of one guy I know who met his husband on Grindr and a woman who met her fiancé on Tinder, as well as countless long-term relationships that started on OKCupid.) Where are the many, many millennials who get married in their early or mid-20s? Reading Sales’ article, you’d think Tinder had wiped out all these millennials like, well, that aforementioned asteroid wiped out the dinosaurs. But there are still millions of young people muddling through relatively “traditional” experiences of dating (and romantic deprivation).

Taking a moral-panic approach to something like mobile online dating makes for a good story, but it also drowns out the opportunity for a richer conversation, and hardens certain false notions about millennial culture. Online dating clearly is changing how many people meet other people and date and have sex. But it’s probably changing their behavior in all sorts of different, sometimes conflicting ways. In some cases, it’s probably helping people find husbands and wives sooner, leading them to have fewer sex partners. In others, it probably does lead to some decision paralysis and frustration with dating. In many cases, it probably just reinforces the user’s preexisting preferences — pro- or anti-promiscuity, pro– or anti–finding someone to settle down with.

The Tinder effect: psychology of dating in the technosexual era

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… More importantly, and in stark contrast with the overwhelmingly negative media reception, Tinder has managed to overcome the two big hurdles to online dating. First, Tinder is cool, at least to its users.

Indeed, whereas it is still somewhat embarrassing to confess to using EHarmony or Match.com, Tinderers are proud to demo the app at a dinner party, perhaps because the alternative – logging off and talking to others guests – is less appealing.

Second, through eliminating time lags and distance, Tinder bridges the gap between digital and physical dating, enabling users to experience instant gratification and making Tinder almost as addictive as Facebook (the average user is on it 11-minutes per day).

But the bigger lessons from the Tinder effect are psychological. Let me offer a few here:

  • Hook-up apps are more arousing than actual hook-ups…
  • Digital eligibility exceeds physical eligibility…
  • Tinder does emulate the real dating world…
  • Romanticism is dead, except in retail

This Guy’s Tinder Tantrum Is So Outrageous It’s Hysterical

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It is constantly amazing to me exactly how entitled certain men feel to women’s time and attention. And to sex. Let’s not forget all the guys who feel entitled to sex. In this particular exchange, we see a guy make a seemingly unprovoked sexual comment (I mean, there could have been some build up we don’t get screenshots of, but it really seems to come out of nowhere). This in and of itself is not unusual or surprising, nor is the fact that the girl messages asking him to stop contacting her. So far we are par for the digital dating course.

But whereas most guys might send one or two confused or upset follow up messages before moving on like the grownups they theoretically ought to be, this guy commits to his outrage like nobody but an egotist or a 2-year-old really can. The resulting temper tantrum is so intense it’s downright comical. Like, I recognize all of the truly harmful, misogynist, and entitled attitudes towards women that are at play in this rant, but the overall effect is just so outrageous it’s funny.